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Wow. Your story really moved me, because something similar happened to a good friend when I was in college. A few days after he scared her, he came back and raped her.
I always felt that I could have done more to help her.
It’s slow at work, so if you don’t mind, here are some ideas.
First, you must understand that you’re in danger.
Fortunately, you scared him away, and you have some warning. Please use this warning as an opportunity to make sure you’re safe.
Since he touched you, he’s certainly thinking about you a lot. These thoughts may drive him to return. I don’t pretend to know the psychology of these people, but I would plan for the worst. Here are some ideas that will minimize your risk:
This is what you need to do today: 1. If you haven’t left for work yet, lock all of the windows in your house. Go around and check every one of them. Depending on the locks you have — if you can, use pliers to make the lock as absolutely tight as possible.
Don’t be alone in the apartment over the next week or so. Even if your fiancé leaves for work or class a few minutes before you do. The guy may be watching the house, and waiting for him to leave. Leave together, and arrive together.
When you get home, check all of the locks again.
Close every blind and curtain you have over every window. If a window isn’t covered, use a bedsheet (hillbilly curtain). Don’t allow him any way to see into your apartment.
Since you’re in an apartment complex, contact your neighbors, and tell them about what happened. Even if you don’t know them, knock on their doors and tell them. You can ask that the keep an eye for people who don’t appear to belong there, or are hanging around. The will probably agree to do that, and they will be grateful that you told them about the problem.
Can you borrow someone’s dog for a week or so? If you can sneak it past the apartment managers, a barking dog is hands down your best defense from someone invading your home. Even a little dog is fine. You want a dog that will start barking like crazy if someone comes into your apartment (If you’re in Delaware, you can borrow my Great Dane, Regan. She has an awesome bark, but will also want to sleep in the bed with you).
Talk with the management of the apartment complex. Ask for new, better locks on the windows, and a good deadbolt on the door. Follow up your request with an email, re-stating your request. That way it’s on record in case they don’t act, or if something happens again. If they won’t change the locks, can you?
Even if they say no, at least change the window locks at your own expense. Good ones aren’t expensive. Go to a hardware and ask.
Will the apartment complex allow you to install motion sensor lights outside your windows? These are relatively cheap, but are effective in chasing away peeping toms, burglars, etc.
You said that your locks were useless — did he break them, or get past them somehow? Or were your windows unlocked?
- I’m reluctant to mention this, but if you were my sister, I would get you a shotgun and make sure you knew how to shoot it.
A shotgun is best because you don’t really have to aim it, and one hit will usually do the trick. But don’t keep one in your house if you’ve never shot it before.
See if you can borrow a shotgun and have the owner take you to a range to fire a bunch of rounds. That way, you won’t be reluctant to pull the trigger when the time comes. Many times, people with a gun, will freeze up when they’re facing an intruder. Then the intruder takes the gun and uses it on the homeowner. Surely you have some redneck friends or family?
Then keep the gun in the same room with you, loaded. If you hear the person break in, you will only have a few seconds until he’s in your face, in your bedroom, etc. You won’t have time to get it from the closet, load it, etc.
But that’s only if you don’t have kids.
- Buy a big mag light flashlight, and for the next week or so, have your fiancé use it to walk around your building after getting home, a couple of times a night, and first thing in the morning, looking for footprints, and people hanging around. etc.
He should also make sure the ground under the windows is swept flat so that footprints are easily visible. This is the type of flashlight I’m talking about — www.amazon.com/Maglite-LED-3-Cell-Flashlight-Black…
Before he walks out the door, make sure you agree on a secret knock or something for when he comes back.
Peeping toms are generally cowards, so the guy will likely run away if he sees your fiancé outside.
Tomorrow— 1. Consider installing an alarm system. Redditor Solo-Rex used to install alarm systems, and he’s been giving great advice on another thread. Here’s a link: www.reddit.com/user/SOLA-REX
Lastly, here are some links to sites with more information. idiotsguides.com/static/quickguides/homegarden/ine… home.howstuffworks.com/home-improvement/household-… dsc.discovery.com/fansites/ittakesathief/tips/home…
Please keep me posted, and let me know if you have any other questions.
Your self-appointed big brother, Mongo