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HIFW my mom tells me after I’ve already eaten two handfuls that she put sugar free gummi bears in the gummi bear jar, and my boyfriend is getting back from a month-long business trip in… 8 hours.(r/TrollXChromosomes)
I can only pray that the evil they have done unto my insides passes swiftly, but it’s not looking promising.
Update: I am genuinely concerned about having to drive to the airport in 2.5 hours
Update #2 (pun unintended, but obviously unavoidable): I feel like I owe all you wonderful trolls an update. By the time I had to pick him up from the airport the worst of it had subsided, and I successfully managed to make it there and back, and through the rest of the night without shitting myself. Never again.